Some interseting links about Whatsapp scaling

Whatsapp Scaling

1) https://vimeo.com/44312354
2) http://www.erlang-factory.com/upload/presentations/558/efsf2012-whatsapp-scaling.pdf
3) http://highscalability.com/blog/2014/2/26/the-whatsapp-architecture-facebook-bought-for-19-billion.html
4) http://lanyrd.com/2014/erlangfactory/scwqrt/
5) http://www.erlang-factory.com/static/upload/media/1394350183453526efsf2014whatsappscaling.pdf

The Monk who was old and did not sell his Ferrari

So finally time has come to bid farewell!!! You will be missed my old friend.

Mr Roger Waters once sang

"Where were you when I was burned and broken
While the days slipped by from my window watching
And where were you when I was hurt and I was helpless"
You were there when I was burned and broken. You were there when my days slipped by from my window watching and you were there and I was hurt and I was helpless.

Because some hopeless business executive could not manage your sales and loyalty, we have to look down an empty bottle which we did not drink.

You were the monk who taught us principles of life without selling your Ferrari. You did what you do best.. help us get over that bitch and that failed exam, and that fucking boss and that annoying neighbour.

I grew old with you. Life was such a bliss in just 135/-. You were available any where in India... Let it be CP in New Delhi or Shilong or even in Chennai.

I worry about my friends who used to swear by you any time and especially the one who can have you with almost anything including Amul Milk. Nehra Ji .. aab to baas Dodh hi bacha hai....

I worry about this new generation who is studying in engineering and medical college ... who will help them drawn their sorrows of failed love and a passed exam.

I worry about the people who drive Bullet... what will they do and drink in Ladakh. with no water... you were the only monk who followed them all the way up there and lighten their sprit by your sprit.

One of my friend even had a selfie with you and put it on his houses entrance... Parikshit das I know your pain...

I will miss you when I am sitting in a under construction house with my school friends holding a steel empty glass... Chandra Shekhar Yadav..... we will miss this Monk....

Prerit Gautam.... Mere bhai.. Maat ro.... Jisko Jana tha woh chala gaya... Aab toh sirf empty bottles hi hai... I told you do MBA... so that you could have joined Mohan Meakin Ltd’s and saved us this eternal grief... 

You were the Chuck Norris of Rum...People Campaigned to make you India's National Drink ... If not you then Johnny Depp would still be doing shit like Edwards Scissorhands... and the world would never had known the love of a pirate for his Rum.

Today don't feel like doing Cheers... but that would be against the sprit with which you loved us back.... So Cheers my Old Monk....

डियर मैगी

डियर मैगी,

दिल दुखता है जब-जब ये सुनता हूँ तुम बैन होने जा रही हो,

आख़िरी बार जब तुम्हें खाया था, तो पैकेट फेंक दिया था डस्टबिन में, 

दिल करता है तुम्हारे पीले पैकेट को डस्टबिन से उठाकर सीने से लगा लूं,

तुम्हारे टेस्टमेकर के चमकीले पैकेट को डायरी में छुपाकर रख लिया है, 

लोग गुलाब छुपाकर रखते हैं, खुशबू को बाँध कर रख लेना चाहते हैं, 

मैं टेस्ट मेकर की खुशबू बाँधकर रखना चाहता हूँ, उसे साँसों के रास्ते पेट तक पहुँचाना चाहता हूँ,

सच कहता हूँ आज तक कभी तुमसे कोई शिकायत न रही,

कभी ये नहीं सोचा कि तुम दो मिनट में तैयार क्यों नही होतीं, समझता हूँ मजबूरी तुम्हारी, वक़्त लगता है,

‘मैगी’ लड़कियों सा नाम है, आज तक कोई लड़की दो मिनट में तैयार हुई है कभी? जो तुम तैयार हो जाती,

कभी इस पर अफ़सोस नहीं किया कि तुमने अपना वजन क्यों घटा लिया? 

क्यों तुम पाँच से छह, दस से बारह, और बीस से तेईस

की हो गई, शायद यही विकास है, विकास की कीमत चुकानी ही पड़ती है,

तुम सिर्फ ब्राण्ड नही हो,जैसे निरमा, सिर्फ निरमा नही, कछुआ,सिर्फ कछुआ नही,

ब्राण्ड नही हो तुम,तुम विद्रोह की जननी हो,घर के किचन में मम्मी-बहनों-चाचियों का साम्राज्य था

तुमने हमें किचन में घुसने का साहस दिया,हज़ार सालों में जो कोई नहीं कर सकता था तुमनें कर दिया,

दबाए-सताए और किचन से भगाए हम बेचारों के लिए तुमने किचन का रास्ता खोल दिया,

वर्ना हमें तो बस गेंहू और गीली दाल पिसाने के काबिल समझा जाता था,

किचन में घुसने को भी तब मिलता जब सिलेंडर बदलना हो,

हमें झिड़का जाता था,हमें रोटियाँ बेलनी नहीं आती थी,

नहीं पता था कैसे चावल में तीन ऊँगली पानी ज्यादा डालकर उसे भात बना दिया जाता है,

नही पता था पराठों में आलू कहाँ से घुस जाते हैं,फटकना-बीनना, गूंथना-बेलना, उबालना-सेंकना, तलना-छानना, ओटना-घोटना, सेराना-मोना, पुटकी देनाहमें कुछ नहीं आता था,हमें बस आग लगानी आती थी,किए-कराए पर पानी फेरना आता था,जले में नमक छिड़कना आता था,तुम हाथ लगीं तो पता चला इन गुणों से तुम्हें मिलाकर पेट भी भरा जा सकता है,

तुम न होतीं तो जाने कितने लड़के घर से निकलने की हिम्मत न जुटा पाते,

कितने सपनों की बाहर कितने दिन खायेगा?’ सरीखे सवालिया औजारों से भ्रूण-हत्या कर दी जाती,

कितने तो मेस के आलू-मटर में मटर तलाशते रहते,तुम हाथ लगीं तो लगा हम पीसीओ से स्मार्टफोन में आ गए,

अब माँएं हमें हर शाम लौकी की सब्जी नही खिला सकती थीं,

मेस की थाली में पनियल दाल में दाल तलाशने के लिए डूबना नहीं पड़ता था,

हमें पता था एक पैकेट मैगी रखी है हम उससे भूख मिटा सकते हैं,

पेट भर सकते हैं, जान बचा सकते हैं,एक्ज़ाम के दिनों में हम रात-रात भर पढ़ते और तुम रात-रात भर पकती,

मैंने नौकरी की, सेक्टर-सेक्टर दिल भटका, ब्लॉक-ब्लॉक पर आह भरी,

वहां भी तुम पीछे खड़ी नजर आईं, दिलासा देती, पुचकारती, "घर पहुँचो मैं हूँ न!"हर सफल आदमी के पीछे एक औरत का हाथ होता है मेरे पीछे तुम्हारा पैकेट था,

पर हर भली चीज का एक अंत होता है वो कहते हैं तुममें MSG

ज्यादा है,लेड ज्यादा है,लाख बाते कहते हैं,पर मानता कौन है?कहने वाले कहते हैं तुम्हें खाएंगे तो मर जायेंगे

वो नही समझते न खाकर जीना भी कौन सा जीना है?वो तुम्हें बैन करने को कहते हैं,शायद कर भी दें फिर तुम दिखो न दिखो,शायद तुम हमारी जिन्दगी मुश्किल बना रही हो,पर तुम्हारे बिना भी जिन्दगी आसान न होगी,पर दिल कहता है, ये षड्यंत्र है, साजिश है तुम्हारे खिलाफ,मेरे खिलाफ, हर उस लड़के के खिलाफ जिसने किचन में खड़े होने की हिम्मत दिखाई,जिसने वो बेड़ियाँ तोड़ीं जो दूध उबालना तक तो आता नही’ कहकर कास दी जाती थीं, उस लड़के के खिलाफ जिसने आग लगाईं, एक भगोने में पानी उबाल रसोई के सारे नियम बदल दिए, ये साजिश है उन तमाम माँओं की जो चाहती हैं हम सुबह-शाम सिर्फ लौकी खाएं,इस षड्यंत्र में प्रधानमंत्री भी शामिल हैं, वो तो चीन गए थे, फिर नूडल्स पर बैन क्यों?यही है विदेश नीति?यही हैं अच्छे दिन?सवाल बहुत हैं जवाब नही,तुम भी नही,बस एक मैं हूँ..

तुम्हारा,

भूखा लड़का..

How much is too much? India and Pakistan Relationship

I have never understood what in it for India. Why do we want to have cordial relationship with Pakistan? We have fought 3 wars with them and every passing day we are fighting a Quasi war with them, We still want to be cordial with them? WHY??

They have nothing to offer to us apart from the terrorists and some Coarse voiced musicians. We Indians, at least our leadership, is behaving like a guy who is trying to woo back his Girl friend who has kicked him time and again.

Why in the world you want to play cricket with them, give them visa, start trains and bus service for them? So that they can send terrorists? Even if we don’t do this, they will anyways send… so why make it easy for them.

There is saying in Rajasthan, that a Mother monkey keeps its dead child stuck to her chest for many days till it start to decompose. Why is our leadership behaving like a mother monkey. There is nothing for a normal Indian in a cordial relationship with Pakistan. They just wont change, Period.

They have now crossed line by mutilating our Boys on the border…. Do something… Don’t call Heena (Even though my wife wants to buy a handbag like her hand bag)… what do we get out of it.. nothing… Its Pakistan and not China… it is as weak as a limping, blind and gangrened animal… Its dying its own death… let it be there …

Ever since we got independence we are trying to reconcile our relationship with Pakistan.. they occupy our land in Kashmir… and We pay to them for this… we in a way are sponsoring attack on our selves.

We want to increase our trade relationships with them… Why in the world… in all of the world is Pakistan the only  country left for trade relationships… why don’t our govt. improve relationship with France and Italy.. so that we get cheap Wine and Whisky and all we get from Pakistan is Whine!!!

I somehow thing that our leadership does not have faith in the Country’s armed forces… they look scared or a dejected lover who just want to have his girl friend back at any cost.. be its own death…

Heena asks us to Grow up… Yes we should Grow up and stop any kind of relationship with Pakistan and punish them for smallest of infringements… Lets move on .. we have so much of our own problems to solve..

I think its time we stop any further discussion/meetings with Pakistan and concentrate on our own problem…

Its time for us to Say to our leadership that Enough is enough… STOP!!!!

I know they are not listening to me or any other citizen for that Matter… but we should still raise our concerns!!!

Cheers!!!

Did it made any Difference?

Its been a long time since I last Blogged… I was busy with reading a lot of Stuff about Corruption, Terrorism, School Killings, rapes and Kareena Kapur’ wedding. I saw many ‘intellectuals’ (Read: Sobha Dey, Chetan Bhagat, Kumar Avinash, Arvind Kajriwal, Aranab Goswami) talking about how to handle these heinous crimes in society.
But there was no conclusion reached because they all have to stop the discussion for a Break!!!!

It feels really nice to see so much being talked and discussed about these important issues so openly. It feels I am Indian. But what did we gain out of all this? Did it made any difference?

I don’t see anything changing…. none….

we all talk about a positive change in the society we live in… but what did we do for this..

Once  a Great Guy (who know is weeping in the heaven and going on a hunger strike in Heaven) said… to see the change.. be the change…. I also recall hearing a song from a movie made on a book of one of these ‘intellectuals’  3-idiots… ‘Riswaat lena to papa ne sikhya… 100 number toh Ghadi warna Chaddi’ (My Parents taught we to bribe.. if I get 100 then I get a watch else Spanking)…

These discussion and demonstration has done one thing for certain or rather two things for certain….

1) Made people to think that this can happen to them as well

2) And Make Mark Zukerberg as World Order President….

and may be a third one

3) Kuch nahi salla (some MC and BC in between)… iss system ka kuch nahi ho sakta….

 

But I think there is a lot that can happen to this system… (trying to be a optimist in this world of pessimism)

You don’t throw away your car if there is a sound in the car or if the petrol is leaking…or if it does not start… we repair it….

So we need to repair this system….. some might argue it beyond repair… but this is the best we have got so lets make a full use of it … we cant buy a new car… We are Indians…

I am a software developer so whenever I have to fix anything I follow these simple steps

1) Understand the Problem

2) Walkthrough the code to find the Root cause of the issue.

3) Come up with bunch of possible solutions to fix this problem.

4) Discuss with your peers to find the best possible solution out of these..

5) Do an impact analysis

6) Go and implement the fix

7)  Test if your fix works

8) Roll out the new and better working code and get ready for next one to be fixed….

If I understand these social issues that are being talked and discussed, these I can simply apply my software methodology to see if I can fix this problem…

Lets take the example of this Soul who departed from us a few days back fighting valiantly…

1) Understand the problem: The problem is that Males do bad very bad things to females

2) Find Root Cause: Is it Male Libido or Male Ego or Male’s disrespect to law of the land or Male’s disrespect for females. I think the root cause of this problem cannot be just one… it has to be all of these and many more yet to identified.

3) Solution Approach:

A) Death Penalty: Ever since humans evolved to define and understand justice, we have had Death penalty in some form or other. People were Hanged, Gallows, Burnt, Shot dead, Electrocuted and many more fancy ways of killing people.
But did it stop people from committing such crimes? With every day gone the crime rates has gone up…

Ask yourself… Did Ted Bundy ever thought about laws before killing those 29 females, Did Adam Lanza thought about Law before killing those innocent children… Did Ram Singh ever thing of Law when he did this Crime… none of these guys thought about Law….

B) Castration: Seriously will it work… first some facts… the offender has to under go these chemical injection every 3 months and its not permanent… don’t you think he will become much more dangerous for society.. He has a crippled Ego coupled with uncontrolled  Libido… and you hitting both these things.. this will lead to new set of issues…

Laws applies when you get caught… no one things about law while committing crime … this is eternal truth….

Law by Definition is Reactive and not preventive…

I only see one solution to these social issues

As Great Mahatma once Said… ‘Be the change you want to see’….

Education is the only solution

By education I Don’t mean Send every one to school…. Educate Male Child to Respect Females….

A) Parents to be role models for their Son( s ) in showing how to respect females… Treat their wife, mother, sister with respect….

B) Schools should have process that inculcates this respects in Male students…

C) Society overall should show case these little minds that women is the originator and not men. Men by definition respects Originator…

3) Discuss with Peers: Have a closed ended and time bound discussion within society and authorities about these solutions And steps to be taken to implement them.

4) Impact analysis: This change cannot come in one go… it will take couple of generations to be implemented… so plan accordingly… With each generation these teachings will multiply in a very very constructive way.

6) Implement the changes.

At least I have started doing my Bit to fix this problem by discussing with people around me and exploring what else can I do…..

Cheers!!!

Kingfisher Motors

 

So Petrol Prices are hiked again!!! So what!! Its every day routine for poor and frustrated Indian citizen. I lost my sleep yesterday thinking about this.. and all of a sudden ‘Eureka’ it occurred to me that Vijay Uncle (Read Vijay Mallya) should start a Automobile company named ‘Kingfisher Motors’.

For me it makes perfect sense that he should do this…

The most obvious reason to do this is that a liter of Petrol is more expensive than KF Strong. He should invest in research for developing a four wheeler and a two wheeler that can run on pure and unadulterated BEER. May be later improved version can run on Whiskey and Rum.

I can list a thousand points to say that this venture will never fail and will always be profitable. But as I have do to Coding as well so I will keep it short:

Imagine for a second that Vijay Uncle does what I say … World will be a lot better place:

lets see how

1) Alcohol based vehicles have a very low carbon footprint as compared to Fossil fuel.  So cleaner Air to breath. Clean Air means better crop of Barley.. which in turns gives better Beer.

2) As Beer can be made by humans at ease, there is an end less supply for beer.

3) His company being the pioneer will be hugely profitable,

4) My Brother from another Mother (Sid), will have something else on his mind than Deeps and will keep him busy for a while.

5) Ailing King Fisher Airline will revive as he will have to pay salaries in cash instead of in kind.

Now lets see what in it for poor and frustrated Indian Citizen:

1) Drink and Drive will be made legal (You save at least a 2000 rupees in Blore per weekend)

2) Instead of a Bar, pubs and Petrol stations we will now have one single station called ‘Re-fuel Station’ This can quench your and the vehicles thirst at once.

3) Suppose you are going on a long drive and your beer got over.. need not worry , Open the dash board and comes out a straw,and start drinking from your vehicle’s  fuel tank.   or vise versa.. your tank got empty… pour in a bottle of Beer and you are good to go.

4) These ‘Re-fueling’ station will have a Kingfisher Class Attendants (Read KF airline Air Hostesses) to help you re-fuel. So even if you have to wait for hours to get yourself and the vehicle re-fueled, you will not get bored.

5) You don’t have to lie to your Girl Friend, Spouse, Mother, Father for going out to party. You can simply say I am going to Re-fueling station to get Beer.

6) You go to these station and say fill in 40 liters of KF premium. or for Strong people (or vehicles) KF Strong.

 

The Indian government also makes huge revenues from this:

1) About 40% of the State and Central Govt’s revenue is from Petroleum based products and about 30% from Liquor. So if you combine these two, there is 70% revenue for govt and cherry on the toppings , govt does not have to pay to Arabian countries for Petrol.

2) Our foreign reserve will bloat to a point that we might bail out Greece, Italy, Spain. and force them to produce Beer for us.

3) There will no wars in the world as US will stop attacking petrol producing counties.

4) All this money can be further invested to make more and better tasting beer for both Citizens of India a well as for the Automobile industries.

 

There are limitless possibilities in using BEER as Fuel.

 

All hail to the King of Good Times….

 

Yours truly Beer Drinker…

Facebook: No More Social!!! An Open Letter to Mark Zuckerberg.

 

Hi Mark,

First and foremost thing… This is my Personal opinion, so don't get offended!!!

Facebook, is not social any more. When you started it way back trying to rate the Pics, it was social then, not any more.

This is why I don't thing think it is social:

From my experience (this includes my friends and colleagues as well), what do I get to see on facebook, Videos posts (Mainly some Kolaveri Di shit), copy paste of some one else’s status updates, clicking and saying Many Many Happy returns of the day!!!. Fertilizing some one else crops by just clicking, or feeding some food to their animals. This is not social. if this were a social medium, I would have seen videos of my friend sleeping or farting in office and not video of some one I least care about.

If it were social, 500 people posting on my wall happy returns could have called me on my cell (Which they can get from my personal info page) and wished me, if it were social they would have pasted their own status update like, getting bored at my Org’s all Hands. I don't want to fertilize some one else’s crops by just clicking. I want to go to their Farm (if they have one) and get my hands dirty to fertilize their crops. I dont get to see or do this on Facebook. So for me it is not social. 

When we all say that current age and time are of Social network, what do we really mean by it. For me being social is getting together with People on a Tapri (Road side tea Stall), sipping tea from those age old glasses, Smoking till the Tapri walla shuts down, discussing anything from Death metal to technology to cursing Andriod Phones for low battery and apple for bloody expensive iPhones. For me social means when I can get with my friends, colleagues and discuss something which we want to discuss and not see what Dhanush has sung.

For me being social  means hanging out on Kailash ji Tea shop, giving a long stare at any girl passing by and one of us telling us that he dated this girl and laughing at him knowing he will pee in his pants even talking to her.

Facebook, twitter, orkut, linked in, they are anything but social.
Look what happened to google Plus…. did anyone stop and thought about why it was such a flop. People are getting bored of being social this way. Facebook may boast of 100 million subscribers, but does that mean it is a society of 100 million people.  No it is not.
Following Salman Khan or Amitabh Bachan on twitter can not be called social, I call it Stalking. Getting linked to some one on a website is not social. I may have more that 7000 links on linked in, but that does not mean I am social. With how many I really interact. Being in facebook, twitter and linked in has became a fashion statement than anything else. Every one wants to be 

Being social means getting out of your home, interacting with people and environment around you.
Being on facebook or twitter is sitting in front of a LCD screen and sending some messages. This is like seeing Sunny and Matt Erikson making out, thinking instead of Matt its you. Its not you. This is what facebook and twitter are doing to Being Social.

I am sure in coming 4-5 years we are going to see a revolutionary change in the way we interact or act social. Facebook wont be there to see this in its current formant. The current social network format has to change to make people really social. Google will try to stop being another Microsoft. and Facebook will try to stop being Google.

In the end I would like to say, Mark go out of your office with your colleagues and friends, to Kailash ji Tea Stall and see what being social means.

Cheers!!!!